1. Playing with your baby/small child; this is a particularly sad way of taking advantage of a baby’s compact size and weight. Lying on your bed or on the living-room floor playing with your child for hour’s trills wives throughout the world, but not when all you play is Baby Bench Press! Yes, it’s true I have used Daniel to put in a few extra reps; but there’s a slight problem he’s only 9.2kg. So extra milk should be on his menu! The disadvantage of the Baby Beach Press is the wriggling, it’s hard to get the baby to see the serious advantages of this game, and there is also the drooling which can be quite messy. There is also a danger as your child gets older and heaver that you’ll need a spotter. That’s were older siblings can come in handy. But if this is your first child then you’ll just have to convince your wife to spot for you.
2. Dreaming about having a workout; wives throughout the world have become victim to black eyes due to this, although many wives have reported that continuous counting of reps is a lot better than airplane style snoring. Now a clear warning to all guys if you are dreaming about working out then choose your best buddy (another male) to be your training assistant, as calling out a female singer, actor’s name in your sleep will result in a quick slap (in a place we wont mention) and then you’ll be dragged off to marriage counseling for hours on end. And you don’t want that do you? Just think of all the workout time you’d miss! It’s also not a good idea to call out your best buddy’s name in your sleep too, maybe I would be a better idea to workout alone when dreaming.
3. Boring the pants off every one by talking about weight lifting non-stop; now you need to realize it’s not you they hate but you need to widen you vocabulary a bit so every one doesn’t think you swallowed a volume of Men’s Health. Being sensitive is the key; you could be talking to a complete wimp who can’t even do 2 reps with a 5kg dumbbell. Also you need to be able to back up your verbal diarrhea with results. So if your spewing off at the mouth make sure that you really are serious and have goals. I am saying this because revenge is fun! Huh? All those people you bored to death with “it’s the latest weight lifting gear” crap are going to come down on you like a ton of bricks if after six months (or less) if you still look scrawny or a lard ass! Be warned! Talk the talk but walk the walk, or something like that.
4. Hundreds of weight lifting subscriptions fill your inbox weekly; here are some great places that you can get great weight lifting subscriptions;
5. Your wife is losing her temper with you as you spend a ton of money on equipment & supplements; ok now gear and supplements can get expensive, especially on top of all those magazine subscriptions. Here is a little ABC that can help you economize; (If any one has anything after C let me know, ok?)
A. If you have a baby or a small child they make great barbells, and they are free but be warned they are high maintenance.
B. In stead of tons of magazine subscriptions try going online and looking for fee electronic magazine subscriptions. See number five for more details.
C. That old mattress that has been in your garage for the last 5+ years take it out and dust it off. Now roll the mattress up and then get two belts (you should already have a few of these if you have parked a few pounds) and tie them at both ends. Now you have you self a bench for bench pressing and then stand it up and you have a punch bag, I was excited when I made this, ah er…..I mean I read about some one doing this before, a friend of mine, and I thought I’d share it with you ::blush::
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